Monday, April 14, 2008

summing it up

Neither of the Jones Mobiles are adorned with any decorations or stickers. Boring, maybe, but I've never found it necessary to display my political beliefs on my car, and lord knows, my husband tells enough jokes in person. I could never commit to three or four words, either, and I'd hate to fall down the slippery slope that becomes a patchwork bumper.
More power to those who do, though, and I've made a mental collection of the ones that have caught my eye.

The political, mostly anti-Bush ones:

"Be Nice to America or We'll Bring Democracy to Your Country"
"Impeach Cheney First"
"Save a Tree, Lose a Bush"
"Never Thought I'd Miss Nixon"
"At Least the War on the Environment is Going Well"
"My Country Invaded Iraq and All I Got is this Expensive Gas"
These usually share the bumper with faded and torn "Kerry/Edwards '04" stickers. Speaking of, I saw one once that said "Kerry Lost, Lose the Sticker." So now there's the bumper-stickers-complaining-about-other-people's-bumper-stickers genre.

"Old-Time is Not A Crime" was one of my favorites.
"Visualize Parking" is a good one for the city.
"Evolution is Just a Theory, Kind of Like Gravity!" addresses religion vs. science pretty concisely.

And then there's the too-proud Hunters & Fishermen:
"My Retriever is Smarter than Your Honor Student"
"Work is For People Who Don't Fish"
"It Takes Balls to Shoot a Muzzleloader"
"If it's Tourist Season, Why Can't We Shoot 'Em"
These are usually accompanied by "Ducks Unlimited" or "Catch & Release Wild Trout" and "Proud Member of the NRA" emblems.
Some of my favorites are the vegetarian ones. I laugh every time I see one because I think vegetarianism is a funny thing to bumper sticker about.
"Beef: It's What's Rotting in Your Colon"
"If You Can't Beat 'Em, Eat 'Em"
But the one that sent me over the edge and the reason I'm writing this said "Legalize Tofu."
That's my kind of humor.

I encourage additions to these lists.

1 comment:

Amy said...

I would definately put "BEEF, It's What's Rotting Your Colon" on the wagon! YOur lucky I've never come across one.