making lunch for three...

Here is a list of the things I learned, perhaps not for the first time, while cooking lunch today:

1) Holding your baby is not advisable while cooking food.

2) If necessity demands it (which for me, it nearly always does) just put the baby in your sling, leaving you two free hands to cook.

3) If your baby is frantically trying to escape the sling, it will be necessary for you to hold her in with one arm and try to keep the masala sauce from permanently burning onto the pan with the other.

4) If, at this point, your three-year old tries to take control of the situation by squeezing herself between you and the stove and yelling, "Mo-om, put Eden down!", you might benefit by taking her advise.

5) If, instead, you decide to persist because you're tired of everyone else being right about everything and you just want to get lunch made because its approaching 3 o'clock and all you managed to slam for breakfast was a handful of Joe's O's and some spiked coffee and you're beginning to feel the more unpleasant symptoms of hypoglycemia, which include uncontrollable anger, be advised that your yelling will probably upset your toddler enough that there's no way she's going to eat the food you're preparing.

6) And finally, if by all your one-handed efforts, some masala sauce winds up dripping down the side of the pan, please remember amid all the distraction of two disgruntled children that no matter how good it smells, licking the sauce off the side of the hot pan will not yield the flavor sensation you were hoping for.